Random Stuff

Stuff that jumps into my head...and please remember that I am medicated after surgery!

-Pains meds work REALLY well!
-My wife is amazing...while taking care of me...she got our kids ready for school...did laundry...is taking care of Sadie...made the beds...is about to make our lunch...I'm tired just watching her! (Oh...she played Yahtzee with me too!!)
-Finished off Leviticus in the Bible today...lots of rules
-God is pretty serious when it comes to sin
-Thankful for Jesus and grace!
-3 months until I'm full time at church...looking forward to it
-Have some cool pics of the inside of my knee...not really sure what I'm looking at, but it's cool!
-Doctor said to not be up a lot for at least 7-10 days...what defines "a lot?"
-I'm really going to miss playing indoor soccer over the next couple of months...it has been REALLY fun to be playing again! Really fun!
-Friends...God has sure blessed me with amazing ones!
-had our final girls basketball party Wednesday...great group of young ladies...fun night!
-I love the Price is Right...watching it right now!!
-It frustrates me to see people with no health problems that don't take care of themselves...makes me wonder what they could accomplish if they did take care of their bodies!
-First small group Wednesday night...BEYOND excited about the group...I love our new model for groups...
-Time to eat lunch...so I'm out of here! Maybe I'll continue this later...did I mention what an amazing wife I have...LOVE YOU KELSEY LYNN!!

Hey #35...thanks, you actually did me a favor!

I'm having knee surgery today...makes me think back to the beginning of all these problems...Ol' #35...I remember being sooooo excited entering my junior year of varsity....I was SOOOOOOOO excited! I could NOT WAIT for the basketball season to start. Simply could not wait! It was the pre-season and I was starting on varsity. It was a rebuilding year for our team...we had lost 10 seniors the year before...our JV team was solid and most of us moved up. We were playing in a scrimmage...when I was driving the lane...#35 from our opposing team came over and undercut my legs...blew out my knee. Season done. Actually...organized sports were done.

I was devastated...as I posted yesterday...I simply LOVED the game of basketball...played ALL THE TIME! Honestly a lot of my identity came from sports...I hated life in 7th grade...(that's another post!!)...but 8th grade came and although our team STUNK...playing ball, I developed more friends...kinda had this "if I perform well, people like you" thing happening...So I jumped in...got involved in as many things as I could and wrapped my life around sports and stuff. Let myself wander from God.

So when #35 changed my life...I was bitter...angry...felt pretty stinkin' sorry for myself. At one point my girlfriend at the time pulled me aside and lit into me...confronted me on my selfishness...I can still remember the conversation...I was convicted. See...she wasn't just talking...she had lost her mom at a very young age...she knew REAL pain...REAL loss...that conversation shaped me...this was just basketball...sure it was important, but not devastating...that conversation was the beginning of a perspective shift...less on my and what I thought I lost...and more on what the future would hold and how God would use it in my life.

As the years have past...I have become more grateful for #35...I moved from wanting revenge to being grateful...not for the pain that is for sure...(or today's surgery!)...but for the lessons...about what is most important in life...on how to begin to handle struggles...that more than anything...my Savior is FAR MORE IMPORTANT than anything else...AND he loves to use the broken things in our lives to shape us and others.

How about you? What is God using in your life right now to shape you? What has happened in your life that God can use to encourage others? I sure don't like going through the tough stuff...but those times sure change us...make us closer and more like our Savior!

Nothing like playing ball outside!

It has been BEAUTIFUL outside the past couple of nights...at least it has been warmer and some SERIOUS wind!! So last night the kids and I were outside playing...Jaden wanted to play a game of "21." So we started our battle...QUITE FUN!!

The game took me back to when I was a kid...I used to spend HOURS on the basketball court...wind...heat...rain...even snow! (I'll never forget the night I had a bad game in High School...when I got home I grabbed the shovel and shoveled the snow off of the ROCKS in my driveway and practiced!)

I'll always remember the battles in H. S. with Deutsch, Roth and Hillrich at Deutsh's house...(I still think my friend Dave was trying to hurt me!! He believed in Rick Mahorn defense!!) I remember going to Mooney's house to play with a group of guys...and OF COURSE there were the courts by the old Nimisila School...HOURS OF TIME! Always outside...Nothing better than an afternoon/evening of playing ball with the guys...

Last night...the smell...the fresh air...the ball in the hands...just brought back A LOT of great memories! GREAT times back in the day! AND NOW...I get to do it with my kids! FUN!!!

It only took 21 years!

It only took 21 years, but my High School Yearbook is finally right...The yearbook crew asked us what we thought we would be when we got older...I put..."a youth pastor"...Now after 21 years I will be! Starting in June (after the school year) I will be going on staff at the Living Stones Church as a Creative Arts/Student Ministries pastor...I AM VERY EXCITED!!!!

Ever since we had to close Grace Community back in June I have prayed...prayed for God to continue to use us where we are...and to show us what was next for our family. I prayed about moving out of South Bend...even had talks with a couple of people about church positions...We knew that we were going to be open to go wherever God wanted us to go.

During this time...we simply have not had any peace to move out of South Bend...frankly, I have felt that our work here is unfinished...that God has given us an opportunity to influence people closer to himself here...and that work was NOT done.

THEN CAME A COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO!

Sam...our pastor...talked to me about coming on staff...our Creative Arts pastor was leaving and moving to Kansas City and Sam wondered..."where I was at" with "stuff."

WOW...It was a LOT TO PROCESS!!

After A TON OF PRAYER...we really sensed that God was opening this door for us...AND...the church is a 1/2 mile from our house on the Southside of South Bend!!! HOW COOL IS THAT?!

I never would have guessed this a year ago...but God sure has a way of working things out...Romans 8:28...been my verse for years...and here HE goes again!!

2 Years Later...grateful.

2 years ago tomorrow...just about 15 minutes before our church service and my chest started hurting...hurting A LOT! I told our leaders that the service was all theirs and asked Kelsey to take me to the hospital. Found out that I was having a heart-attack...at 36 years old...one of my my arteries was 100% clogged and BAM!!

2 years later, I have a lot to be thankful for...Grateful that I didn't wait to go to the hospital...grateful that I am in better physical health than I have been in years...grateful that I get to be here to love my wife...grow old with her and influence the lives of my children...PLUS...Sadie was born 1 year after my heart attack...what a beautiful gift she is!!!!Priceless.

I am grateful for a new perspective on life. Learning a lot about where we can influence lives the best...I don't want to waste the 2nd chance on life that I have been given...and that is NOT going to happen. My perspective shift has been from performance driven to influence driven...(Maybe that should be my first book!)...but really. I have lived most of my life concerned about what other people think and trying to be the best...now...I still strive for the best out of me, but I look more for how I can best influence people toward Jesus...we can sure do a lot of stuff, but are we really making a difference in people's lives?!

Grateful is a great word for me...in fact...I'm grateful that my mom texted me tonight...because if I'm to be honest...I completely forgot about tomorrow...forgot that it had been 2 years!!!! Too busy livin' I guess! :)

Time for a Dog

We just couldn't wait! We simply can't!! We had our little Zeke put to sleep over Christmas Break and our house really hasn't been the same...Zeke was such a part of our lives...like part of the family...

So, it is now time...a week or 2 ago we put a deposit down on a puppy...and the litter was just born over the weekend...it is our kids (and our!) big birthday and Christmas present for the year. We are sooooo excited to have a puppy for our kids to enjoy!!

Yes...we know the work that goes into a puppy, but we just can't stand the thought of not having a dog around! AND Zeke didn't like kids very much...nay...he REALLY didn't like kids! So...it will be fun to have a pup around that the kids can enjoy and play with.

I'll get some pics up after we get some...CAN'T WAIT!!!!!!!

Sadie Lynn

A gift from God.

Precious Baby.

Beautiful.

Fun.

Wonderful.

A gift from God.

Sadie Lynn is such a blessing from God. In February 2010, I was in a hospital wondering what my life was going to be like after having a heart attack. In February 2011, I was back in the hospital...only this time it was to welcome our new little one...Sadie Lynn...she has been such a blessing.

She is simply wonderful...in the midst of a tough year...Sadie has been a true shining light...there were times over the past 6 months especially where I would just go to her to see that innocent smile...the one that just makes every hard thing in life melt away...

Sadie...you have no idea...not even a clue what you have meant to me and your family...the joy you have brought is simply priceless! I love you Sadie Lynn and I am soooo proud to be your father.

Anticipation

I will never forget that night...Uncle Bob and Aunt Judy were going to take me to buy a new BMX bike...I couldn't sleep...my mind was racing with excitement and anticipation of my new bike. I simple COULD NOT WAIT!

I still remember going to the store...remember buying it (well...they bought it!)...remember riding that bike like crazy.

We toooo often lose that innocent anticipation and excitement...we can get so muddied up with hurt and pain that we don't really want to get excited...We become so guarded...at times as we grow older we have hurts that happen--times of disappointment that such the joy and fun right out of us...

What do we become though if we live that way? It is truly a depressing way to live...we must be willing to risk being hurt or disappointed again.

What is a dream that you have? Or something that you are hoping for or dreaming for? If something were to cross your path...some exciting turn in your life...would you be to calloused from past pain that you wouldn't risk stepping out?

Hey...I just prayed for you...whoever you are and wherever you are at in your life! Prayed that you would be willing to get excited again...to be willing to have that childlike anticipation for whatever turn God wants to take in your life!

Just Go.

The past couple of years have been interesting to say the least...several humbling things have come my way...things that have made me question to the depth of my being...who I am...how I make decisions...how does God really direct me.

Here is something else that I know...a good friend asked me a question back in September or early October...I told him that I didn't know how to know God's will anymore...that I was unsure about just about everything...he then questioned me (I hate it when people use my own tactics back on me!!!!)...asked me what I felt confident about...when it comes to God's direction...what did I still believe to be true...

My answer surprised me at the time...because although my dreams seemed to be shattered...I still felt confident...you know...the confidence in your gut when you just know that you know that something is right...I felt confident in the vision and direction that God had given me back with Hope Community Church...to see lives changed and to be involved in church planting...AND I still felt called live and influence lives right here in South Bend, IN.

It felt so weird to even say it...that I was confident in the call...it didn't really make sense...it has left me wondering what God is up too...and I still wonder what all he is up too...My prayer over the past months is for God to keep me influencing people right where I am right now and to make our next steps very clear...

Sometimes God answers our prayers clearly...and sometimes...he simply wants us to Just Go. To simply step out and step up. To quit sitting around waiting for him to give us some BIG SIGN that this is the next step for our lives...and instead to JUMP RIGHT IN!

I feel that I am at that point right now...waiting...seeking...wondering though if God is simply saying..."just go." In the still small voice like he did to Elijah.

How about you? Do you have something that you have been wrestling with...something that you have been waiting for a "sign from God?" Is it simply time to go...to just go forward and begin to do what it is that God wants from you?

Random Stuff

Random stuff as it pops in my head...

-Spent HOURS yesterday finishing my Teacher of the Year portfolio...been a cool process
-Spent a lot of time on it, but it sure doesn't look like it!
-Been thinking a lot lately of where I can have the most influence...how do I influence people the best
-Giants vs. Patriots...not sure who I'm rooting for
-Coach B from the Patriots...truly a story of bouncing back...he was TERRIBLE in Cleveland, but OBVIOUSLY better now. 2nd chances
-Tom Brady...leader
-Luke stayed all night at a friends house last night...just doesn't seem like he should be that old yet!
-GREAT vision messages the past few weeks at Living Stones...Just love Sam's passion!
-Quote of the morning: "Let's not be excited about a church that is doing things for God, let's BE that church that is doing things for God!" YES!!
-Love how we love the community here...been a good fit for our family...great place to heal and get recharged
-Chloe simply LOVES the youth group...she needed that.
-If I could do anything in the world what would I do...asked myself that this week
-Had a friend say...if he was given 1 million $ what would he do...asked myself that this week too
-Sad that Mr. Cabiness passed away...(read yesterday's post!)
-GREAT to see some old friends Friday...it was tough to leave Bremen when I taught there...GREAT staff...Great kids...Great community!
-Frankly...every school or job I have ever had was hard to leave...
-I simply NEVER EVER want to lose my hope in people...that they can change...that they can live up to their God given potential
-What if...
-What would happen if you got to the end of your life and realized that you focused on the wrong things? Don't worry about that...instead DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!!!
-Alright...I LOVE all the pregame stuff...it is fun!! (Told you this was random!)
-I want to live the 2nd half of my life even better than the first...(assuming I am 1/2 way through!!)...I don't want to just coast...
-Ever heard Keith Green's song: "I make my life a prayer to you...I want to do what you want me to...no empty words...no white lies...no token prayers...no compromise...I wanna tell the world out there your NOT some fable or fairy tail...that I've made up inside my head...your God, The Son and you've risen from the dead! I wanna thank you now for being patient with me...it's so hard to see...when my eyes are on me...I guess I'll have to trust and believe what you say...OH you're coming again...coming to take me away...I make my life a prayer to you......."
-So many times my life gets clouded...clogged up with my own thoughts...the stuff of life but then God just does something...something that grabs me and gets my attention and focus on him...so glad God gives us multiple chances and never gives up on us...